Childbirth

There are so many things that I want out of my childbirthing experience.

A few of the things I want most I already know that I cannot have, for financial reasons.  Such as a home/water birth with a midwife.  Medicaid, to my knowledge, will not help me with that financial cost.

But I still have a lot of opportunities!

I really want to have a natural birth.  I did not expect to want this, but from the moment we found out we were having a baby, I just knew that I didn't want the epidural.  And I want to be able to nurse my baby for the first ten minutes after his/her birth.  Not have him/her immediately cleaned off and weighed.  Fact: babies that are not immediately washed of the birth fluids initiate self-calming behaviors (thumb-sucking, etc) faster than those that are.

I do not want to be induced.  If I am three weeks past my due date, my due date was probably wrong.

I do NOT want to have a cesarian section.  I feel the strongest about this one, I think.  I don't want forceps or a vacuum or anything either, but I really, really don't want a cesarian.

So, I am resigned to a hospital birth. But I am not resigned to a medicated, out-of-it birth.  I am not resigned to being out of control.

I love my fiance.  I love him dearly, deeply, madly and truly.  But when I told him that I wanted a natural birth, he looked at me like I was crazy.  I know him, and he just wants a healthy baby, I don't think that he puts as much value on my birth plan as I do.  And I foresee being in terrible pain with my labor and saying "an epidural sounds nice," to which his reaction would likely be hunting down the doctor and making sure that I wasn't in pain anymore.  Not encouraging me to keep going.  He hates seeing me in pain.  I can only imagine how hard this is going to be on him.

So, what to do?

Aha!  There is another option: a doula.

It's something that is the perfect compromise between the home water birth that I want and the hospital birth that I am going to receive.  Another woman who will be there to hold my hand and remind me that my body was made to give birth.  A birth plan advocate, if you will.

But how in the world am I going to afford that, when medicaid is paying for everything?  Isn't a doula, like $2,000?  I don't have that kind of money.

Here's where the great news comes in that I told you about, Grandma Suzi.  (And to any other friends of mine that are reading).

I just found a Treasure Valley doula who only charges $700 for her services.

Only $700.

... I can do that.  With taxes coming back in, Ben's job and another seven months left to prepare, I can totally, totally do that.

I am almost in tears I am so happy.

She also has a childbirthing class that she offers, which I think Ben might really enjoy, and I know it will help me.

I can do this.

I am going to get to have my perfect birth.

I am so excited.